I’ll extend an apology ahead of time. These first few months of entries will probably be as much (if not more) for me to process through verbally (well, in written form) as for you to read. You’re welcome to join me as I reflect on both the events and thoughts that brought me to this adventure, and what has happened as I prepare for this new chapter in my life.
My interest in Honduras started a long time ago. My church has been taking groups down there for well over 10 years. While I was in college it was something I considered doing, however I couldn't do it because I was in school, and our church went during the beginning of November. And as I moved into teaching, I still faced the same difficulties with time (or lack thereof). That brought me to 2006. In 2006 our church decided to explore interest in a summer trip: the last week of July. I signed up right away, as did a number of other people in the education field and a few college students. I was very excited to go. I had heard wonderful stories, and I couldn't wait to experience it for myself.
A week and two days before we were set to leave, my mom woke me up to tell me that they had taken my grandmother (her mother) to the hospital, and that she was leaving to go there with my grandpa. I had grown up next door to my grandparents. I would run over there all the time when I was growing up. My grandmother first taught me to cook, gave me a love of crosswords, and more importantly would listen to me and just talk with me as if I was an adult. [Don't get me wrong, I love my parents dearly, they are amazing people, but my grandma has a very special place in my heart.] Over the next few days it became evident that my grandma had suffered a stroke, and probably wasn't going to recover. She was on a ventilator for a few days. There was no improvement, and knowing her wishes not to needlessly prolong her life on a ventilator, she was taken off it on Monday. Her breathing grew increasingly laboured all day, and Tuesday morning she died. My aunt was out of the country at the time, returning the day I was to leave. So I had a decision to make. I could stay home, and I was told by many people that no one would blame me for that. If I stayed, I would be surrounded by family, by support, and I would have an opportunity to celebrate my grandmother's wonderful life. Or I could go on this trip, and serve people I didn't know in a country I had never been to. My family was wonderful, and refused to pressure me either way. I don't remember when exactly I made the decision, but I realized that my grandmother would rather have me go on the trip, serve other people, and share the love of Christ with them, than stay home and cry over a body she was no longer inhabiting. So I left on Saturday as planned. The group I was with was extremely supportive. All the people going from my church knew the situation. I spent the first few days of the trip kind of in a fog. During this trip, on Wednesday, I had my first visit to Rancho Ebenezer, the orphanage run by WGO. I thought it was really interesting. They were in the process of building the school. One side was operational, the other was still in progress. At the time I thought it was very cool what they were doing for the kids, and at some point in time, maybe after reitrement, it would be fun to come down there and teach. The last part of the week, I spent the time working in evangelism, and it ended up being an awesome week. Returning home, I knew that I had made the right decision in going.
Summer of 2007 I had the opportunity to go to Estonia, and help at an English language camp put on by some missionaries and a church in Tartu. I greatly enjoyed my time there. I met some incredible people (I'm trying to change up the superlatives a little bit so this isn't incredibly boring to read), and realized that I really do enjoy teaching people period. However I also really enjoy getting to know the students that I'm teaching. It was interesting to hear about what life in Estonia is like. It was strange being in a place that only got about 4 hours of darkness during the summer...I would guess based on the sun's position that it was about 8 at night, check my watch and see it was 10:30 pm. A good experience, and I would have gladly returned, but the following summer I decided to go back to Honduras.
Summer 2008: Honduras trip #2. This time I was looking forward to being able to go without the whole "missing a funeral" overshadowing and messing with my emotions. My grandfather gave me a scare about a week before I left (he fell amongst his piles of junk in his house, couldn't get up again because it was too slippery, and spent a few days laying on the floor until he was found...but I knew by time I left he was going to be okay) however I was able to truly experience everything on this trip emotionally healthy, though a little tired. I realized that I loved being down there. I love the people, I love the country, I love the language (well, what little Spanish I could understand).
Summer 2009: I planned to go back down to Honduras this summer. I was becoming a regular on these trips, and figured that's where it would stay. About a month before we were to go to Honduras, the president of Honduras decided to do a little...creative...and unconstitutial...decision making in order to potentially prolong his tenure in office. He was removed from office and the country, and spent the next few months trying to get back in, which caused basic unrest and periodic closing of the airport in Tegucigalpa. Due to this, the decision was made (12 hours before we were scheduled to leave) that it would be prudent for us to cancel the trip for this year. Immediately after I found out we had cancelled the trip (a few hours later), I called my parents who were in Minnesota, visiting my grandparents up there. I was already packed...granted to go elsewhere, but 30 minutes of shuffling clothes and thing later, I left to drive up to Minnesota. I arrive shortly after midnight (there is no traffic on those roads late at night, at least not random Friday nights in July) and spent the rest of the weekend visiting with family up there. I cherish that time now, because it was the last time I was really able to talk with my grandfather. He died later that fall. I did get to see him the weekend before he passed, which was such a blessing, and I did make it to his funeral.
Summer 2010: I went back to Honduras...this time with my younger sister (among others). I knew what to expect, and figured that this is just something I do now. I know my way around somewhat. I've worked in almost each part of the medical brigade. I can do this. It's amazing how things can seem "routine" after a few experiences...we are constantly defining what is "normal". Tuesday night, as we were talking about the day, what had happened, etc. the announcement was made that we were going to Rancho Ebenezer the next day (as per normal), however if you didn't want to go, you could stay behind and help sort pills, because the pharmacy was running low. I considered staying behind. I went to bed that night planning on staying behind. I had been to the ranch twice, and didn't see why this was going to be any different from the previous times. However, I decided to go, mostly because it would be Carolyn's first time there. I didn't realize there would be other effects from this trip.
From the time I got out to Rancho Ebenezer, I felt a pull. As I was walking around, looking at what I had seen before more than once, I felt like I was supposed to be there. I'm not really one for the whole "touchy-feely" thing, so I was ignoring it, figuring that I was just feeling queasy from the not-so-calm bus ride over the not-quite-smooth dirt road. I spent some time speaking with the person guiding our tour, asking questions about the school, the ranch, etc. In the course of the conversation, she made a comment that usually they were okay on staffing, however they had never found someone comfortable teaching upper level science classes. They also had trouble normally with upper level math classes. I laughed a little bit, which earned me a questioning look, and I explained that I teach both of those subject areas. The conversation turned a little more informative after that, in terms of "well, if you were interested in coming down...". I left the ranch feeling slightly uneasy, but again, put it down to the wonders of yellow school bus transportation. Over the next few days I had more conversations with people at the mission house about what all teaching down there entails. I spent a lot of time thinking about it and praying about it. When I left Honduras that time around, it was with the idea that sometime in the next five to ten years, I may be back to teach.
About a week after I got back home, I was e-mailed an electronic application. I started filling it out, got to the point where it asked for references, and decided I wouldn't bug people then, because it was after 11 pm, so I'd talk with them sometime later and get back to the application then...and I forgot about it.
In October, in the course of a week, I had three conversations with three different people in which Honduras came up. Suddenly it was always on my mind, pressing, nagging me. So I spent more time praying about it, and decided to finish the application. That Saturday, I e-mailed in my application...and I waited. [I also told my parents and pastor during this time what I was up to. My pastor was very excited. My father's first comment was "we're not taking your cat!" which was expected because my mother is allergic to Loiosh. But they were happy for me while still making sure that I know what I'm doing, and I'm being realistic about this...which is good. That's what parents are for.] I heard back from them by e-mail in November (which seemed an eternity later...I think I need to learn to be more patient). The e-mail basically said they had received my application and wanted to talk with me sometime on the phone. I replied back with free time that next week. Through a little miscommunication, we finally did connect two and a half weeks later, the day before Thanksgiving. I was contacted two weeks later for an official phone interview. After the phone interview we both spent the next week in prayer. On one hand this frustrated me a little bit, mostly because I had been praying about this for months and felt that this was clearly what I've been called to do. On the other hand, I was very appreciative that they as an organization want to make sure they are pursuing what God wants, not what they want. They need an upper level math and science teacher, however they wanted to make sure that I was the one God had chosen for this. A week later I was asked for clearance to contact my reference people (to make sure I had let them know it was coming), and I got an e-mail a few days before Christmas that I was being asked to come down this coming school year to teach at Rancho Ebenezer. Wow...I'm really doing this!!!
Currently, where I am in the process: I've requested a year-long unpaid leave of absence from my school district. It has to be approved by the board, which will be meeting the end of January. I have been verbally reassured by a few people (who should know) that it will go through, however I still am waiting on the official confirmation. I also am beginning the process of getting organized to fund-raise. This first involves setting a budget (so I know how much I need to raise) and writing letters, talking with people, and oh yes, a lot more prayer. [If you need to jump-start your prayer life, apply to become a missionary, you'll have no choice, or you'll get nowhere!!!]
I'll be updating this as often as I can. I plan to post parts of the process, as well as what I experience while I'm there...and probably (eventually) what I go through as reverse culture shock sets in...coming back to the States after a week abroad is shocking enough. I can't really imagine what it's going to be like after a year.
No comments:
Post a Comment